I am REALLY struggling the last couple of days. The desire to have a child completely consumes my thoughts. I literally (I am NOT making this up) have 16 friends that are pregnant right now. 16!!!!!!!! I just can't handle one more pregnancy announcement!
I look at pictures of my nieces playing in the park and think to myself "I would LOVE to have a little girl to take to the park in the morning."
I see posts on facebook about my friends' little boy requesting pancakes for breakfast and I think to myself " I would LOVE to have a little boy to make pancakes for in the morning"
I see my friends screaming little baby and she looks at me as if to say "are you sure you want kids" and I think to myself "I would love to have a screaming little girl to console and rock to sleep"
I just want a family. I am going to start looking into updating our adoption certification and adoption attorneys. I am exhausted. The last almost 7 years of my life has been devoted to starting a family and what do I have to show for it? 3 angels in heaven, seemingly endless heartache, a stressed marriage and lost friendships.
Something has got to give.