Pace and I went on vacation. First to KS to visit my family (which can be challenging since they all have children) then to San Diego to just relax and enjoy the cool weather. The trip to KS actually went amazingly well. Of course it was hard seeing my niece and nephew knowing that I should have a child that is a month younger than them. It was even more difficult watching my niece take her first steps knowing that I should be reveling in this milestone with my own child. But...I survived.
I spent some wonderful time with my brothers, sisters, cousins and parents. I was relaxed and actually thought about non-IF related things more often than I thought about IF.
San Diego was AMAZING. Ok - it was cold and cloudy. A lot of people complained about that, but not me...I LOVED it! I loved every minute of walking on the beach with my husband and my dogs with a jacket on while looking out into the gray, gloomy cloudy sky. Heaven.
While I was in SD, I got to meet a longtime Internet friend that is on an infertility chat board that I have been a member of for *gasp* 5 years. It was so wonderful meeting her I just can't explain it. She has been such a wonderful friend and supporter over the last 5 years, it was beyond awesome to wrap my arms around her and give her a big hug!
So do you all remember how I was kind of bragging about how regular my cycles have been since my m/c in February? I mean 28-30 cycles are more than phenomenal for me! Well....that wonderful season is over. I am currently on day 56. Grrrrr so frustrating. So we are going to wait another week and then take some meds to bring AF to town. Then...we are moving on to our first Fem.ara cycle in 3 years. Our previous Fem.ara cycle was our very first IUI back in '07. It didn't work - at all. I have much more faith now however because I have my thyroid stabilized and I am on Met.formin. Neither of which was in place when we were doing IUI's before. We will not be doing IUI with the fem.ara, just trying the plain old traditional way.
I started seeing a life coach about a month ago and I can't believe I waited so long. I love her and I love what I am learning about myself! She is a fellow IF, so she absolutely "gets" where I am, where I struggle and how frustrated and out of control I feel. That is an amazing feeling! I am hoping to stare these next cycles right in the face and go forward full steam feeling positive, hopeful and as relaxed as possible.
Thank you to those that are still reading my blog even though I am not very good at updating. I am still reading yours as well, even though I don't comment often enough. The majority of you are pregnant now or have just recently had children which is wonderful, I just hope you understand that sometimes it is difficult to read or comment.