Monday, July 11, 2011

The Girl Who Cried Wolf

Before my most recent miscarriage, I started a private FB group so I could keep friends and family updated of our TTC status without having to make 1 million phone calls, emails, texts etc. It worked out really well, but I haven't updated it for the last two cycles.

Ever since our miscarriage and then RPL panel results, I just haven't felt like telling anyone what we are doing. I feel like the Girl Who Cried Wolf. You know...."Hey...we're pregnant...Oh...just kidding we aren't pregnant anymore." I just felt like this was such an emotional roller coaster, I wasn't sure I wanted my friends and family to be riding anymore.

I told each of them that I would completely understand if they wanted to leave the group, of course no one did, but I suspect some wish they never had gotten the invite in the first place. I don't begrudge them for that.

Pace asked me the other day why I hadn't been updating the group on where we are in our cycles and I just told him it was too exhausting. It was too exhausting to expect words of encouragement from friends and family only to be disappointed, or to be insulted by well-meaning platitudes that are posted in the group. I just don't have it in me right now. It is difficult enough to drag Pace and I through this hell, but I don't want to bring my friends/family with me.

Don't get me wrong, if someone asks...I will provide information, but I am not providing it unsolicited anymore.


KC said...

I feel the same way. I tell people when I am cycling because I need the support but when things go wrong I don't want to talk about it and I wish I hadn't told people.

"His Perfect Timing" said...

I think that's a really good decision to not post the info so much. With all the stuff you have to remember, let alone remember to blog about to family, its much too painful of a reminder. There are enough reminders as it is. :) Glad you are taking care of "you" with this decision.