Monday, September 15, 2008

Not so much today

Not So MuchToday

A month ago I was lost
I was sad and broken
I was living a nightmare
No words could be spoken

To make me feel better
To feel more at peace
My heart was shattered
My happiness had ceased

I was angry and bitter
I hated my life
I felt that I was let down
I felt like a horrible wife

The devastation I felt
Was like none before
I had lost my child
I could take no more

More than three years I waited
To have a child in my womb
Now it was all over
And my body, now a tomb

But not so much today
I am not quite as sad
Not as full of hate
And my life isn’t so bad

The sadness remains
The devastation is still there
But it isn’t quite as strong
It is something I can bear

I still ache for my baby
That will never go away
But my hope is returning
More and more every day

Written by Me September 15th, 2008

6 comments:

Nikki said...

Such beautiful words Nichole. Yes, the aching for the baby never goes away, but hope creeps back in. I wish you lots of hope and easier days ahead.

Hope2morrow said...

Sounds like things are getting a bit better. I have been thinking about you, girl. Take care of your heart and be well.

Earl Gearl said...

Very moving. Big hugs.

I Believe in Miracles said...

***BIG HUG***

Bec said...

Oh honey :(

Dreamer4agift said...

Absolutely beautiful...I think it's awesome how your words seem to come out of my head too:-)

You're right, the ache is still there, we just learn how to deal with it.